“So the wife’s got me tuning up the lawnmower while I wait for corn-planting season,” said Dave Winston as he settled in at Mabel’s Grill the other morning.
“That’s what you get for getting the tractor ready so soon,” said George Mackenzie. “When my wife hit me up about the lawn mower the other day I said I was too busy working on the tractor and corn planter,”
“I dropped off my lawn mower at the local small engine shop the other day,” said Molly Whiteside as she picked up the conversation when she came to the table to take the guys’ orders.
“That’s one of the advantages of being a single woman with kids,” said Cliff Murray. “Nobody expects you to fix things yourself.”
“Well thank goodness there are some advantages,” Molly said defiantly. “After two years of staying home more than working, and doing without tips I’d forgotten I ever had any advantages.”
“Well getting the lawnmower ready for the first spring cut was a nice excuse to put off getting all my paperwork ready so the accountant can do my income tax,” said George after delivering his order to Molly. “If I wanted to do books I would have been an accountant myself and had a whole lot better income.”
“And you might have given a better tip, too! I find accountants leave decent tips – unlike you guys,” snapped Molly as she scribbled down the last of their order and headed back to the kitchen.
“Well it’s worth it to have extra work come spring like tuning up the machinery after putting up with a long winter,” sighed George. “I don’t know what I’d have done if I hadn’t fed the birds and had them and the squirrels to watch on those stormy days.”
“I can’t believe that you of all people would turn birds into welfare recipients,” said Dave in surprise.
“Hey, I’m just helping the hungry get through the winter,” said George sharply. “Those are hardly welfare cases. As soon as the good weather arrives most of those birds don’t even come to the feeders anymore.”
“Yeah, and spring is a nice break from the winter bills,” said Cliff. “I got to almost hate the sound of the furnace coming on, especially when winter hung on in early March.”
“Well at least you’ll be saving money on fuel and buying bird feed, although it won’t go far compared to how much more expensive it’s going to be to keep the tractor running for seeding,” grumbled Dave.
“Yeah, but higher gas bills are a small price to pay to hurt the Russians for what they’ve been doing to Ukraine,” said Molly as she brought the guys’ plates. “Those people are really paying a high price.”
“Easy for you to say when I’m the one who has to pay for planting 500 acres of corn,” grumbled Dave.
George winked at Dave then suggested, “Yeah, the price of fuel is going to be so high this spring that I may have to stop leaving tips when I come to Mabel’s.”
“You leave any less and I’ll be paying for your meal!,” shot back Molly, then turned on her heel and returned to the kitchen.
“So I suppose you have less crop to plant because you have pasture and hay for your sheep,” Dave said to Cliff as they dug into their breakfast.
“Yeah, it’s one advantage to sheep compared to your pigs,” said Cliff. “Less work now but more come haying season.”
“Kind of takes away your excuses for helping with things like raking the gardens,” said Dave.
Cliff sighed heavily. “My wife agrees with you but the last couple of springs I’ve put off raking last year’s old stems and such after reading that gardening columnist in The Rural Voice who said bugs like to overwinter in those old stalks and you have to wait for them to get active before you rake the gardens.”
“Huh, and then they probably head straight for my corn fields and I have to spend even more money to get rid of them,” grouched Dave.◊